One Knackered Old Wreck - Part 2

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Take one knackered old wreck... Part 2 of a winter’s tale

What can I say…? What can I say! Immortal words from Johnny Cash that describe my feeble lack of progress. Soft flesh weakened by hard booze, brain frazzled by Christmas lights and late nights - and a 2500km trek across north Africa to escape this bloody cold!

The reasons are many and varied as to why the old beemer has been neglected in a state of shameful undress, sat in a corner of the shop waiting for the final strip down. The frame’s appointment with a shot blaster long overdue. But January is a month of old resolutions and new promises, so I’m back with renewed determination, a half decent tan and no money. Time to wield metric spanners!

The frame had to be completely stripped down to the last nut and bolt and have any unnecessary bits removed, like fairing brackets, grab handles and little pointy bits for a bicycle pump… Yes, this great lump of Teutonic iron had a push bike pump as standard kit - It’s got to go, no self respecting café racer could be that sensible! I also decided to powder coat the wheels, so they had to be stripped too. Taking a deep breath, I applied cutters to rusty spokes and took comfort in the knowledge that someone else will know how to fix this mess.The frame and wheels have gone to the paint shop and shiny bits are on order, which means I can turn my attention to the engine.

The big, horizontally opposed twin will only get cosmetic treatment, maybe with K&N air filters to sharpen the look of the carbs. Performance isn’t really an issue, it doesn’t have any and there’s no point in trying to give it some. If I want to scare myself witless, any bog standard sports bike will do a better job in half the time. This masterpiece of German engineering will make progress in style. To be honest, the poxy brakes couldn’t cope with much more power anyway…

My next challenge will be the re-assembly, when the frame and wheels come back. Now that the bike is scattered over various parts of Sussex being cleaned, painted, polished and misplaced, all I have to do is get all the parts back under one roof and assemble one café racer. How hard can that be?

And I need to decide on a name. Bill? George…? Anything but Sue!

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